7 Secrets to Being a Tantric lover

Being a Tantric lover is really fun, simple and effective.

Do you want to drive him wild and open his heart to deeper intimacy? Do you want to know how to hit her buttons, over and over again?

Tantra has a lot to do with being in the physical realm, so it doesn't need to be woo woo or complicated. 

Here's 7 Sensual yet Simple Secrets to Being a Tantric Lover for Men & Women;

1. Breathe more deeply when you are with your partner or potential lover. Breathing into your groin, belly and then chest will awaken your sensual charisma, which will be felt by your sexy interest and they will wonder why they are suddenly turned on! 

2. Gaze into their eyes. Again, this is simple, but how many of us really look into someone's eyes? We may on the first date because we are really curious about this new person, but then we get into familiarity and we forget there is so much more to learn about our lover. Really taking time to look deeper into someone's eyes, and simultaneously allowing yourself to them seeing you, is really juicy. It's like you are telepathically saying, "I am not afraid to let you see me, and you have all my attention right now." Even if your partner seems uncomfortable with all the extra intention, keep with it (I mean, don't be creepy, be natural but don't back away from the intimacy!), show them that you desire to connect. I assure you they will soon melt and things will heat up.

3. Listen to their body. The body speaks. It gives us a clear signal if we are getting a yes or a no. Crossed arms = Protective/Afraid. Woman rustling her own hair = I want you. Playfully touching you = Take me now! Follow their cues, listen to the sounds they make, and if in doubt, ask them what they want in a sexy whisper. 

4. Feather light touch. If you get the go-ahead to get closer, start with the lightest, slowest, feather light touch you can do. The lighter you go the more sensations the skin will feel and become aroused. You can certainly switch up the firmness and speed, but starting with and coming back to the slow, sensual touch over your lovers skin will awaken their sensuality and their ability to be present to every stroke. As will you. 

5. Slow down baby. A good, hard and fast lovemaking session is fun, but like step 4, you've got to change it up otherwise it gets robotic and desensitizing. To really be a Tantric Sex God/Goddess you need to slow the pace down, practice elongating the pleasure and delaying satisfaction a little. Add all previous steps to a slower, sensual and intimate pace and you will start to tune into a deeper level of connection and love making. 

6. Spread sexual energy. Using yummy coconut oil and following your breath (you can ask your lover to breathe slower/deeper also), run your fingers from their sexual center up over their stomach, between the breast/chest, over the throat, lips.. caress your fingers through their hair and then exhale the energy back down over their arms, body, down their legs, all the way to their feet. Work your way back up to the inside of their thighs and gently, cheekily touch over their sex. Repeat, watching how their body moves and where your fingers are drawn to. The intention is to spread the pleasure all over their body (you can simultaneously do that with your own with your breath/awareness the more sensitive to the sexual energy you become too). Spreading the energy allows for a more expansive feeling in the body, the pleasure can start to ripple throughout every inch of their/your skin and this is how full body and multiple orgasms can occur (for both sexes!). 

7. Breast massageBreast are the center for intimacy. Think about it. Our heart sits right at our breasts. Our heart is not just a physical pump to keep us alive but the place where we feel deep emotion, love and connection. When the breasts are stimulated and the nipples are given a firm yet loving pinch, Oxytocin, the love and bonding hormone is released. For women, this also causes the uterus and cervix to lift, making them more ready for penetration. Women and men can both become extremely aroused by a sensual breast massage, just be sure to check in if they have overly sensitive nipples. Women can usually handle a stronger pinch at the base of the nipple, whereas men not so much. But, everyone is different and remember to also switch back to lighter caresses, and most importantly, listen to what your lover wants first. 

It may take a little bit of coordination and practice to remember to breathe deeply, while softly, slowly caressing their skin and staying connected to what their body and the sounds they make are telling you. But, it will be so worth it. For them and for you! 

Now go forth you Sexy Tantric God/Goddess you! ;)

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